LIFE happens harder And faster in 2014 | Q: Do children STILL aspire to...???

"I admired EVERYTHING about her And so I grew up, even after her passing away, wanting to look just like she And the other beautiful black women surrounding me" 

                            

< ---- In the snippet above I'm speaking of my mother: "Having Tea With My Sisters"

She, to me, wasA beautiful example of whatA mother, wife, sister, daughter, neighbor, friend should be!.. After her passing... my 8th grade teacher (Mrs Ruth Taylor) became my hero... in latter years, forA period, it was my aunt (Brenda)... And even since - I have women that I look to And respect.

I'm preparing for my return trip home (reminiscing about my childhood) As I reflect, I wonder.. .. .. Are the days gone that WE are nurturing strong inspiring examples to our children ??? Do children still aspire to grow up to be just like their mom dad aunt uncle teacher ???

LIFE seems to happen harder and faster in 2014. Are we positioned (morally financially spiritually) to be examples; to our youth I guess would be a better question?

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Give And Take

I PERSONALLY believe a sizable portion of maintaining a relationship has much to do with compromise and give And take.

My ex gave a little in our relationship; I took a little... I gave a little; he took a little And that worked well for a time. I was happily on the receiving end in one aspect of the relationship And I realized I should have been just as happy in my GIVING to him in another, and - I was - more than happy... In my giving, however, I noticed he was slightly annoyed by what he perceived, in me, to be too strong of a self image; mistakenly I might add. I definitely had insecurities - we all do - some of us more than others... In identifying my insecurities, however, I did the greater rather than the lessor.................... Chapter 1 "Having Tea With My Sisters"

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It's my praises you should sing!

"Having Tea With My Sisters" pg. 77 & 78
(Sam this was written with you in mind)

"Tarin’ me down"

Tare me down? But I’m your sister Black.

Whoever coined the phrase “Sticks and stones may break my bones but your words can never hurt me,” stated only a partial truth...
Yes, sticks and stones may break my bones – but the truth be told
Your words – they also hurt...

Walking down the street, afraid to walk past a crowd of my brothers. My head is bowed.
Yeah, I know what you’re thinking – you’re so ignorant you say it out loud

Okay! So my hair is short, and it’s little kinky
But you should realize King, these locs…these curls hold decades of African Culture…YOUR history.

Since you don’t know maybe I outta tell you so
I‘m a Queen. And you… you are a King,
It is my praises you should sing.
Extol Me
You I will raise high…High Black above the sky

The young Black mind needs to be trained,
The intellect refined
Worthy of love; of elevation
Not ignorance or humiliation

We must learn to invigorate and stimulate wealth and Power of the mind.
Wait a minute. Listen...
: a person or thing having great influence, force, or authority; Power defined.

Love me your Sister… Admire my wide spread eyes and beautiful brown skin.
Tarin me down should be a sin
I desire to be elevated, my Brother, not hated

Let the Love you have for a Sister
ALL Sisters be positively communicated.

Author: Pamella Coffey

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Twitter: Pamella @PoodleTweeting

my quirky behaviors...

I've learned that WE can go thru life NOT hating ourselves but NOT really loving ourselves either... I know - for myself - I had to learn to embrace each of my quirky behavior(s)...

                                                                                                         www.Havingteawithmysisters.com

I embrace the fact that I'm sometimes wrong - And I sometimes make mistakes - I embrace my sometimes slurred speech And my occasional stutter... I realize I can sometimes be introverted shy And slightly withdrawn... I embrace the fact that my written communication is often times better than my verbal... I embrace my long skinny legs And tiny physic... my big teeth And thin lips *And I could go on*

I've learned to move thru LIFE loving myself which frees me up And allows me to be open And freely love others... I've further learned (And tho it's unfortunate) WHEN we Are not happy - And IF we dislike ourselves – it's likely – we will almost effortlessly but most certainly dislike others.

I don't know *shoulder shrug* maybe it's scripture, genetics, or possibly my zodiac sign ??? - ummm, tho I AM NO WHERE NEAR PERFECT !!! .. .. .. .. .. .. .. I reiterate "NO where near" lbs I personally believe it's not hard nor should it be all that complicated to love one another 

Having Tea With My Sisters

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• Some of us look to be reminded that we are unique beautiful and complex in our own individual right… And we are – ALL of that.

BE truth BE genuine BE beauty BE love

Has It Always Been

Has it always been the sultry sound of jazz softly playing?

Shhhh… listen. 

pitter-pat… tap  tap   tap

- The rain is falling, just, outside my windowpane. 

- The look of a well-groomed tastefully dressed man

with strong yet gentle hands

- The first lick of my favorite ice cream cone "mmmmmm"

- The fresh scent of my—clean—bare skin

- The ability to talk it all over with a close male friend

- Chowin’ down on some good ole collard-greens and hot water cornbread fried crispy but not too thin

- My own reflection in the mirror

… My favorite dress fitting me just right

- The anticipation of being with the man I adore

On, in, and all through the night

- Some 'Down Home Country Blues' You see I’ve always liked the blues

- Walking on a cool tile floor [toes painted pretty] I have on no shoes.

Just a few things that have always turned me… 

Author Pamella Coffey | Having Tea With My Sisters

                                                              BE truth BE genuine BE beauty BE love

Whenever I found myself in THE fragile position...

"... I had picked up these characteristics/flaws along my passageway of life, as an innate coping mechanism, and I had made them part of my package deal. Whenever I found myself in the fragile position of having to entrust my heart to someone else, I would quietly back away.

But you know love is a funny thing. It doesn’t matter how solid or how high your wall [you know your protective barrier] when you fall in love it will be penetrated. Like an organized body of troops has just stormed and invaded your private space, it will be penetrated."    Chapter:1 pg 49

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When We are made to feel good...

Isn't it curiously funny how when many of us are made to feel good OR special by word or deed; a full-grown woman, feeling content, will take on childlike behavior? We began batting our eyelashes [bashful in manner] becoming giddy - wanting to cuddle with our man - nudging nose to cheek while speaking in a gentle tone so soft and smooth it would shame a firm stick of butter.

Feeling like a young school girl sitting on the front stoop of a red-brick brownstone on a hot sticky summer day… - feet swinging, fashioning two ponytails [A pink ribbon on each] yellow ankle sox, canvass whites, denim shorts, and a pink-tee with a young Michael Jackson plastered across the front. Deliberate in your inspection of each lick of your favorite flavored ice cream cone “mmmmm” delightful. Chapter 1 | pg 12

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Many of our lives have been interrupted or shattered by broken relationships...

Having Tea With My Sisters

Author: Pamella Coffey

www.Havingteawithmysisters.com
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"Many of our lives have been interrupted or shattered by broken relationships...

We find ourselves picking up the pieces alone while trying very hard to put our lives back in order because we allowed ourselves to totally trust in And rely on a man – for what we expected and hoped to be – complete and total fulfillment. Impossible!

Impossible and unfair to expect or Ask of any man outside of God,Himself, and Him you won’t have to ask.

Please don't misinterpret my comments as “man bashing”; oh no… contra’, that is not my intent. I absolutely adore men, and I love being in a relationship with a man who is deserving of my love.
Being in love, loving someone, and having someone love you back is a beautiful thing. Actually I believe it to be a blessing.. And it should be honored as such" .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..  Chapter: 1 | pg: 40, 41

Ladies we are amazing creatures...

"Ladies, we are amazing creatures. We are strong human vessels; God created us this way. Just take a moment to examine your life. Think back… look at some of the trials you have come through And out – and the great accomplishments you have made – some of which you had almost given up on..."

"I believe in living on purpose! I am convinced my purpose was not to be birthed into this world ‘drawing the breath of life’ to simply muddle thru life with no consciousness… offering nothing and giving nothing back; taking withdrawals and leaving no deposit!"      
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BE beautiful! It's your birthright!

My creativity is not in competition with my neighbors' (in other words, my creativity is not in competition with my sisters') And just as I am certain my creativity cannot be authentically duplicated (and I am certain of that thank God) neither can my sisters'... No worries there.

I am so very comfortable with who I am And what I have to offer *smilin'* therefore I do not look at my sister (who Is also Shining) and began to question my position... 

FOR ME... IF there is a time when I feel a tinge of any of the following: un-confident; uncertain; insecure; doubtful; inhibited; OR timid... I simply stiffen my spin And hold-fast to who I am. 

I would like to encourage some And remind others "we EACH OF US are unique complex And beautiful in our own individual right" ... ... ... http://www.Havingteawithmysisters.com

Remember after YOU the mold was broken. And what YOU have to offer NO one else can *wink*

Love And Peace

Shine Bright likeA Diamond...

There will be times when peeps will want you to hide your light underA bushel. 

I would like to encourage you to shine... SHINE brighter *wink*  Author Pamella Coffey "Having Tea With My Sisters" 

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