the PROCESS...

Maintaining an open willingness to make self-improvement... Being open to And honest with that realization will make us much wiser women. One of our life jobs should be to continually work on self
Not to the point of self-absorbance or over indulgence but by allowing ourselves to welcome and continue self-growth: physically, mentally, and spiritually. Excerpt "Having Tea with My Sisters"


1. self image: the idea, conception, or mental image one has of oneself.

Q: What do you see when you look in the mirror?... Q: What do you think of when you examine yourself?... Q: Is the she you see "picture perfect" when "made-up"?... Q: Is she flawed when undressed ??? 

It is absolutely OK if/when we see cracks underneath our surface!... NO one knows our story BETTER than we do... NO one can tell it as well as we can!... NO one is fully aware of our journey!... ... ... ... the peaks And, at times, the rocky roads... ... ... the hills... the valleys And mountain tops... our rivulet of joy And, at times, the steady stream of pain... ALL people see is what we put out!... Shouldn't we want to "put out" something; THEN; that, even IF, flawed is genuine?... I DO!... soooooo for life... I continue the process: Keeping it Real while Working on Self   *hehe* poodle

sb: THANKFUL my Creator renews a Right spirit IN me

power of the mind is what's REALLY phat!

 "... ... ... I’ll let you think you have left me behind... I ain't coming at you with a gun or a knife. I’m coming at you with the power of my mind." partial Excerpt: "Having Tea with My Sisters"

Q & A
Q: Have you worked in an environment or found yourself in a social setting where you overheard comments and/or conversations that were prejudice and unfavorable to a certain race or social group of people?... Q: Have you witnessed treatment that was unfair | improper | inflexible | unjust?...

IF yes Q: In those moments did you feel an urgency to speak up/out?... Q: Did you feel a slight race in your heart... a flicker... a rush... a light sweat to your brow?... Q: Did you restrain yourself?... Q: Did you quiet that inner voice?... Q: Did you turn a deaf ear to your humanity and morality?... Q: *your breath. bated.* Did you inhale And swallow your words in a slow gulp?... were your words passed BACK down your throat instead of out your mouth?... Q: Did you silence that conscience man who was right at the brink of saying something as simple as "I disagree" OR "That's not right"?...

IF yes Q: Did you hold your tongue because you thought it ALL (the environment, the situation, the people) inexorable?... Q: Did you think, perhaps, your voice would not be heard; or were you afraid, perhaps, it would be!?

A: I have... And um 98% percent of the time - my inner voice spoke up/out... it's that 2% percent that I had to contend with. #Inexcusable #Period
A: @ a time I supervised 6-7 men; primarily minorities; I witnessed and overheard things that left suuuuch a bad taste in my mouth. There came a time (several) when I had to speak out; not just because I too am considered a minority; but also because these negative types of behaviors should be disallowed. Period.
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Q: Have you witnessed something in your own cultural environment that you knew was wrong?... i.g., A hand in the pocket or pocketbook of another passenger on the bus... Q: Have you reluctantly silently nodded in agreement with a statement that was bias toward a guiltless individual?... Q: Have you mocked the behaviors (all in fun) of another race or group of people?

IF yes Q: Why?... Q: Did you experience peer pressure @ the ripe old age of 35?... Q: Did you miss your moment to speak - And felt a resurgence, of a conversation you were already uncomfortable with, would be a bit too challenging?...

A: I have... 98 perhaps 99% of the time I spoke up/out... it's that 1 or 2% percent that I had to contend with #SELFexamination #CHECKyourself
A: I was on public transportation (13-14 yrs of age) and I witnessed a "pick-pocket" caaaarefully going into the pocketbook of a middle-aged woman. I wanted to yell to the woman. I wanted to scream "ma'am he has his hand in your purse" I sat there; on the edge of my seat; And held my  tongue until he had left the bus. I then eased from my seat And softly said "ma'am that man who was standing, here, beside you... the one who just got off the bus... Yes ma'am him... He had his hand in your purse."

Reflecting and And pulling my own coattail ; )            *Effective Communication In Love* 

piece of the American pie || YOUR dream...

Many of us, at some point in our lives; even if fleeting; have desired that picture perfect lifestyle And obtaining a piece of the American pie... THAT picture perfect image of the type of life we should live. Well, in my humble opinion, it's just that... an "image" !!! ... ...

Remember, each pie, And the hands that prepared the pie, is different, each pie is sliced up differently And each slice will be proportionally different...
Your dream, though it may be the general consensus, is not my dream... just as my dream is not your dream... Excerpt:"Having Tea with My Sisters"

Living a full complete happy life is truly our purpose! I dare not try to live anyone else's.

footer: Some of us start with a dream... others create our dream as we move thru life... live love and BE happy... ... I'm my happiest when I'm co-creating, with my Creator, ... something that is thought to be impossible - into the possible\ poodle

Pamella ‏@PoodleTweeting

never sign up4 someone else's dream b4 committg to your own no matter how good the sale. NO ones dream shouldB bigger than your own #Experience

I loved him\...

After our time has passed and we are, for the moment, no more

 … our bodies no longer entwined.

And even after the earth has rotated twice around the scope of the moon... Yep. 2 times...

 When I inhale – I inhale you.

Before – when we were yet still together

And as I sought to please And in-turn received pleasure

Then is when I did – And I did so purposely.

I took a breath, And inhaled…

 I could smell the most intimate parts of you|| 
And then almost innately my sensual sense stored within my innermost part

Stored for safekeeping…For reserve…

Reserved for this time when our bodies are no more entwined. My body not yours. Your body not mine.

I close my eyes… my head to one side

I can feel your strong hands

rubbing – caressing and handling me

If I dare to part my thighs to, try to recapture,

I can still feel each stroke - deep and wide - But like the wings of a dove ~ a flutter ~ so gentle inside

I see you in motion…

The like of a jaguar as he mounts his prey

You are part of me – and I – I am part of you

Do you find me as I find you?... Delightfully delectable. Yeeeeees baby, I know you do\ poodle

Excerpt "Having Tea with My Sisters"

little black Princesses...

Excerpt "Having Tea with My Sisters" 
"It is absolutely imperative that we initiate a positive developmental pattern, in our youth, instilling a certain level of morality and positive precepts in our sons, daughters, and younger generation as a whole. Our children are our future – a cliché – but true nonetheless. 
Our beautiful Black Princesses are ill equipped for their entrance into adolescence and young adulthood. Many do not realize their own self-worth, which of course is, rightfully esteeming themselves highly. How then can we expect them to ask for, or demand, the love and respect they – each of them – so rightfully deserve?" And yes... WE SHOULD START WITH 
OUR OWN! 
I can remember way back when I was in school... 
riding the bus with Mella & Tina (my twin sister and my best friend)... we were laughing & talking (toward the back end of the bus) and a; tight lipped; elderly lady said aloud while shaking her head "I don't know what's gonna happen... these kids - nowadays - are terrible"... she then threw her head to one side, rolled her eyes, And snatched her purse up closer to her bosom. 

I can remember being juuuust slightly offended... thinking to myself, as I continued to laugh & talk with Mella & Tina; glancing every now and again at the tight lipped elderly lady; why did she say that?... we're not bad kids... we're not being disrespectful... ... ... I mean... we were not using profane words; we were not obnoxiously loud; neither of us had stepped on her foot; we DID say "excuse me" when we rushed past her... we were just young teenagers headed home after school... talking about whatever we were talking about on the back end of the bus (CTA Chicago Transit Authority).

I thought of that elderly woman recently when I found myself riding Chicago's public transportation (CTA)... ... ... for her, our generation was perhaps too loose, too loud, And somewhat threatening *a chuckle as I think back* BUT as my cousin Gladys (love to my family in Houston Texas) would say "baaaabeee" THESE kids NOW! A! DAYS!!!

good morning... um - I - looked past...

I was able, dis morn, to look past each crease. I took pause And looked past the darkened shadows that encircled my eyes. I peered deep And saw my soul. I am beautiful.







MORE than poetic - this piece is 'real life' 
I woke early on a spring morning... ... I had fallen asleep with a heavy heart and had awaken feeling pretty much the same. I slowly rose And made my way to the bathroom... I paused; as I passed the bathroom mirror - my head slightly bowed; I stood there for a moment And leaned closer into the mirror. I first noticed the creases underneath my eyes; my eyes were somber and full of sadness; my face showed a face that had weathered some years of hurt, disappointments, heartache, mistakes, BUT there was a lot of joy hidden there too... I stood there a little longer; staring at my reflection; and I could feel the heaviness lifting... I smiled because MORE than my physical make up (this shell that covers me) I love my inner being... ... my intent is never callous or of ill will And tho I'm not perfect, my nature is sincere and well doing... Yepper. Indeed... I am beautiful!... ... ... I then started my day with my personal affirmations | a light workout | yoga | prayer & meditation... I started THAT day living in the present! 
                               *Occasionally we have to remind ourselves* 

My niece, a gorgeous young lady, said it well in her fb post earlier this week. RE-POST - - >

Charise aka Boo

January 30 near Chicago via mobile

"I am beautiful inside and out, smart,caring and loving person! It's so funny to me that when u feel this way or when u say these things about yourself. Some people associate this with being conceited. I don't understand their logic because if I don't love myself how can I ever love anyone else. My definition of being conceited is put yourself on a pedestal and trying to make people around you feel less than you maybe because they aren't like you, u feel they don't have as much as u or may not be as educated as u. When u talk down on someone or put up status to degrade people just because u feel u are better for what ever reason. You show the world ur insecurities! If u see where someone is weak give a hand or even some knowledge to help them better themselves, don't tear them down or don't say nothing at all. Good Morning World #womenempowerment"

MY safety position of CONTROL...

"coming from a history of ................................ I had developed my own defense mechanism and it had become part of my package. So in addition to my good attributes – when triggered – you would have to deal with my occasionally defensive and, at times, standoffish behavior.

My ex, for example, mentioned on several occasions how he did not understand how such a loving person could also, at times, be so emotionally restricted.
Restricted? I did not understand. I would scowl my brow and ponder my mind asking myself, “What did I do now? What the hell is this man talking about?” You see I had lived this thing for so long, still carrying some of the emotional injuries I suffered at the hands of my abusers, that I did not recognize how defensive and, at times, limited I could be in my personal relationship[s]. I simply saw my behavior as being that of the behavior of a strong Black woman; dealing with situations as they presented themselves and not dealing with anything that would jeopardize my safety position of control.
HA!... lol *a piece of work*
I had picked up these characteristics/flaws along my passageway of life, as an innate coping mechanism, and I had made them part of the package deal. Whenever I found myself in the fragile position of having to entrust my heart to someone else, I would quietly back away." Excerpt from "Having Tea with My Sisters"

NOW... years later... I am so thankful for growth... life happens; unfortunately for some; EVEN when we are just babes [Selah]  I think one important key to life IS always being open to growth... mentally | physically | spiritually! Poodle

my treetop | my son... the uppermost part of me

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  Wow... 23 years ago, today, I gave birth to one of the most precious gifts God has blessed me with!... my son | my treetop .............. "my treetop" because you are the uppermost part of me... I love you more than you can possibly imagine... I am well wishing you much success much joy many blessings and loads of love love love! Happy Birthday son.